Every year,
usually in October or November, my dad gives me the same task: rake 25 bags of
leaves. I usually milk the “I have
homework” excuse dry after a few weeks and am forced to pick the coldest day of
autumn to go out. At this point, everyone in my family has already completed
their share so I hit the yard with only a rake and some music.
I think
only of bags. Filled bags are friends and empty ones hold me back from freedom.
Often I fill bags illegitimately. Sometimes I steal a few leaves from my neighbor’s
knee-deep sea of leaves, or maybe I toss a soccer ball in to fill up space.
Mainly, I just target the easy, exposed leaves, avoiding digging under bushes
at all costs.
After three or four long, painful and
lonely hours, I have loosely filled twenty-five bags, winning my freedom. I
feel amazing; a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. My dad, on the other
hand, does not. The yard still looks terrible. Remnants of old piles dot the
yard. A sharp line in the corner marks exactly where I reached twenty-five
bags. My father’s main goal was to make the yard look nice and he failed.
However, by his bag-filling standards, I have scored 100%. The main goal was not achieved because of how
my dad chose to measure its progress.
I face a
similar issue every day in school. School’s main objective seems obvious:
Educate students. However, our school chooses to do this by giving students a
series of tasks and ultimately measuring success with tests. I view these tasks
similarly to how I view filling bags. I want them completed by any means
necessary so I can move on with my life. This attitude leaves me with
incomplete work and incomplete understanding. Many students with the same
attitude turn to cheating to get by. The end result remains the same: good grades
with poor understanding.
The
solution lies in changing education’s values. If I took pride in having a neat
yard, I wouldn’t consider the number of bags I fill, nor would I waste time
filling bags illegitimately and the end goal would be much cleaner. Similarly,
if students valued learning over high test grades, students would actively seek
out their own methods of learning instead of cheating. Students would go above
and beyond their expectations and America’s future would be changed for the
better.
Liam,
ReplyDeleteThis post is very well written. I love the way you used the comparison of an obligation of raking leaves to the obligation of going to school every day. I completely agree that almost every person who attends school doesn’t receive the understanding of subjects that they should be. Two things you may want to consider. In paragraph two you say “hold me back from freedom” talking about filling the bags carelessly and then in paragraph three you say “winning my freedom”. Using “freedom” talking about the same thing sounds a little repetitive and you could get rid of one of them or describe the feeling of finishing in a different way. Also the second sentence sounds a little choppy maybe instead of using “and” in that sentence you could use “but” or make a new sentence. I thought the way you chose to write this post was great. Instead of just making a one sentence comparison, you extended it and described it to make it for engaging. Overall, your post was engaging and well written and I enjoyed reading this post very much.
Liam, this is a very well written and creative post. I too love the analogy to raking leaves. That worked perfectly as a segue into your actual argument. Unfortunately, though, I wish you could have provided some more convincing evidence. You really don't prove anything. You have a very clear point of view, one that is becoming more and more popular among students, parents, and teachers. In this post, you really just provide a superficial agreement to this position. A better response would have tried to convince me, or your readership in general, that testing is diminishing the quality of education. Trust me, the evidence exists.
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